I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what’s next in my life in terms of work and family. Right now I’m a Solutions Architect which is great and all, but my first love has been and will always be programming. When I started down my career path I never envisioned what the road would be like…and just how hard it would become to stay dedicated to a dream that always seems to elude one’s grasp. In a sense though, I do have the feeling that this was meant to be since as the Scripture clearly states, “A man lays his plans but the Lord directs his steps” (Proverbs 16:9). At times (I’ll be quite honest), I become rather disgruntled because I don’t know what’s next. Over the years I’ve accepted this as being quite natural despite the fact that it has been proven to me over and over again that I really don’t need to worry about the next bend in the road, when God says He’ll provide, He is as true as ever to His Word as He was in days long past. Trust is something I’ve always spoken about, but dealing with it is easier said than done. Yet when you do you end up realising that the fears that were keeping you grounded were…well..groundless (been waiting for years to use that one!).
T.D. Jakes in his book “Even Strong Men Struggle” mentioned that when he began working at first he didn’t see where his first jobs really meant much in terms of his overall goal. But they all taught him skills he would need later to succeed. And succeed he indeed has. I think it really all starts from humility. It is said in Proverbs 22:4 that “the reward for humility and fear of the Lord is riches and honor and life.” When I look around me on a daily basis I really don’t see much to be proud of anymore. This does not mean that my ambitions are dead, it simply means that my perspective has changed because my reference point is no longer success in my job, it’s success in God. He wasn’t very cryptic about what it would take either–the mandate is pretty clear (you can check Matthew, Peter, Romans etc, it’s hard to pin down all the verses that have to do with this), but the long and short of it could be found in the parable of the talents. For if you are given a gift and you do not seek to take care of it and to grow it, then why should your master be pleased with you? In a sense that’s what I feel a lot of the time now. I’m good at what I do because thankfully the Lord blessed me with an inquisitive mind. But now so much of my time is spent servicing worldly needs that I wonder if I’m doing anything towards the Kingdom. Yes I try to lead a good life but we all know that’s not enough. I try to talk about God when I can but that’s not enough either. There has to be more…and I’d really like to step out of my comfort zone and take a walk in unfamiliar territory, where I know I will be tested. That’s my fork in the road–I can either continue with the mundane or I can go the road which leads to the unknown. It’s great to do well at my regular job, but it would be even better to do well for God.
Despite my grumbling, God proceeds on His own time. I can’t say when opportunity will start knocking, or even if it is already, but I’m praying that it will and if it is, that my eyes will be opened to see it. I’d love to turn my programming skills into something useful for the Lord. I think that would be one of the coolest things that could ever happen in my lifetime. In the meantime, I’ll just stick with Colossians 3:23 and work at whatever I’m doing as if I’m working for God, and not for man. In time I’m sure I’ll be given even more things to do so I can be of greater service!
Yours in Christ,